Sex, Talk, Cry or Blog

Let go of your thoughts and frustration. Do it the way you feel best...sex, talk, cry or blog. I feel so light when I write something. Like a selfish pig I think we should just let go of it. We don't speak a lot of things thinkin' that may be I am weird...but that ain't the case. For a long time I thought that I look at a chick's ass and that how weird I was, But no...90% of men like ass...
I guess statistics prove that either I am not weird or 90% of men are weird. Hmm...Interesting...

Anyways...Spoke to Sujit. Want him to blog about cricket. I think he eats, drink and sleep (read masturbate) cricket. When they can invest $250 million on a mannequin (David Beckam, what else would you call a guy who changes his hairstyle every 3 months), they should probably invest a few in Sachin Tendulkar or Ricky Ponting. Anyways more on that from our sports columist, Sujit.

Bollywood…
Anurag Kashyap is real furious about all the crap butted out for No Smoking…Can’t comment till I see the movie. One thing I give to critics, I decided not to spend $10 (by not watching it in theaters) and would watch it on DVD. On the other hand, I read Anurag’s blog on PFC , man he is always drunk when he writes, I don’t know whether he is really angry or it’s the keep walking frocky man??

Great ideas don't come in vacuum....

Now onwards I'll have 2 sections in my daily article Life news and Bollywood news.

Life News - Great ideas don't come in vacuum.

Had drinks at the get together, spoke to people in tangible product business, the are too happy with what they have. They don't understand the dynamics of Internet business. Have to tap in to find somebody already in software business for funding. Why the F*** do I have to think so big. I can think small and start a online shop on yahoo small business..But I want something different..I constantly have to remind myself -"Great Ideas don't come in vacuum". But no harm in trying. My assembly line is lines of code, my factory is a server and my target audience is users, who don't have to spend a dime getting my product (which I haven't thought of, Yet!).
If I can't succeed in it, can't succeed anywhere.
I dream of making a Larry Page or Steve Jobs out of me. Who knows may be I will?

Bollywood news - Mutual masturbation

Anurag kashyap is one guy I admire...I just love the way he coins up these phrases.
The latest to come is Koffee with Karan(An indian talk show) is a mutual masturbation club! Awesome choice of words for a sissy f*****' show.

Made my first F****n' Penny, Long live GOOGLE!

Alright...the payday is here. Made one full whole polished penny out of my blog...
Thats one hell of an achievement...Whew!! Lots of work, lots of efforts and google rewards me with a full blown penny! Alright so what do you want me to do with it...shove it somewhere?? It ain't gonna be my ass, so that's right, you heard it, It's your big giant ass that's gonna take the brunt of a one full penny you got there for me!
Well, it's not google's fault, I got some 80 impressions but even with that my cost per CPM works out to be some meager 10 cents. Huh! google, has it's monopoly, they won't disclose how much they are making out if it. Is it fair? I dunno but I know for a fact if google wasn't there, I wouldn't have made the f****n' penny I made. Long live GOOGLE!

Tik Tik Tak Tak..

This evening gotta go for an after hours SOBA(Scindia old boys association) get together.
On one side I want to network to increase my visibility, on the other hand I haven't really gained much from any of it in the past.You go drink, have a good time, laugh and then go home and sleep.
Next day you forget all of it. You feel hesitant to call the guys you met and then you meet them again in another get-together. Oh..long time...I know...Really busy..How is life..And again you drink, laugh and then forget all about it...Ah! I have to be more productive, talk business, but wait..wat business? I don't have any
business..did I forget..I don't have a f****n business. Thats the whole point. Figuring shit out for myself...
May be I should play a character, just like in movies.those 10 bucks an hour actors who play Rupert Murdoch like characters. Acting all pricey and throwing weight around..have some slapstick one liners that no one wants to laugh too..lots of hand movement(that I do), cigars and b*****s.
Good Idea...I'll do that of course except the b*****s part.

Wacky dream blends life and news

In the middle of heavy traffic I am running to the only bus out of town..All I have is a bag full fo change. I drop the bag out of anger and run to the bus, I pause, look back, someone is trying to steal my change, I yell at him, run back to get the change, I collect my torn up bag of changes, all my dollar coins are gone, all I have is quarters, dimes and nickels. I sob, run back to the bus. Now all of a sudden I have my IPod on. I am dancing like that wierdo shadow in IPod ads, there is fire e very where, I run to the bus but the bus is right ahead of me and BAAAM! I am hit by the bus..and then I wake up. What a wacky dream that was!

Knee pain and brain teaser

Monday, toughest day of the week got even more tougher. Had knee pain, couldn't commute for 2 hours to the city, so took sick day. Thought of doing something at home, may be a little work but ended up licking techcrunch and gigaom. I go there to take inspiration for my work. looks like I am taking too much inspiration and doing too less actual work. It sure does look like the beginning of end. But wait, I am hopeful, Look at the brighter side, I found 10 things not to work on either because someone else made money out of it or lost it. Either case, I win or may be I loose if I had thought before all. But then I didn't think. I think I am mixing 2 passions of my life, technology and writing(films). I know a guy started a firm sold it for 20 mil and is noe a director of some 3rd grade movie. DOn't want to end up like that. Want to have a clear vision. want to make up my mind. Want to succeed, well does that mean I am not successful right now? I am, Mark says that. I don't.
Ah..time for beer...more later

Om malik replies...

Got my comment replied by Om Malik. Felt like on top of the world. Nobody replies to me on http://www.techcrunch.com. They think I am just trying to get attention. May be I am. Like a helpless kid, no where to go, I am trying whatever I can to get noticed. is it good? ..I don't know. What should I do. I don't know anybody. People around me are helpless, just like me.

Alright...the weekend is finally here. Finally feeling good. had some scotch and watched some TV. Felt guilty for watching TV. Why am i doing this? Why am I wasting time. I don't have time. All I have is 2 hours after work each day and my weekend to finish off my work. Lot of work, lot less time. I hate myself, could have gotten away with just some basic stuff and poor fast coding. But no, I want the whole object model. The whole plan of my new product has turned out really well. I can;t believe I am that good. I remember my previous manager at DowJones said, You are a terrific programmer. But I want to be more of a business person. Thus the need to do something of my own.
Don't know why people live in the city. I love the commute, so much time just to think and beyond. Spoke to mark and vlad. I want them to start blogging too, they are just shy I guess. Sujit, wants to try it out too. Let's see when he gets started.

I called my wife facebook....

Ok...the day started on a bad note. Slept at 1 in the night. Woke up at 6. Had terrible headache, don't know if it's lack of sleep or just too much that is going on in my life. read so much about facebook that called my wife facebook. Was dreaming about an argument I had with someone about facebook and it's future. Who knows where will all the facebook hoopla take it. My bottom line for any business is - hey if it makes money its a good business today. If it can make money tomorrow it will be a good business tomorrow. Facebook is making good money today, if it sustains it it will the pioneer. Google was in loss before it went public. Facebook knows one thing for sure, Innovate or you will be dead.
I think on the same line, I want my first product to be for public, just for public. Will take the risk. I don't need any angel investor. I'll do it myself. Tried partnering, Didn't work. Work load is too much. Nobody wants to work.They want million dollars to fall in there lap...snap..just like that. Ain't happening in this world.
Work is hectic..Can do stuff very fast..but then there are hours when I don't do anything. Everyday in train I feel sad for wasting time, Can't help it. THe only consolation is that I realize it. May be I'll correct it someday. want to work in team.looks like no one can cope with me. Is it that I am too fast or just too confused? Don't know! I guess everybody wants that answer. Either you have a problem or you are pretending to have a problem. Happens to me all the time. Happened today, didn't know if I had headache or was pretending. Took a tylenol, it went away, I guess I really had headache.
Going for a meeting..later